Why Am I So…Compulsive?

Why Am I So…Compulsive?

When we think of addiction, we usually think of something that is inherently unhealthy: substance abuse, gossip, pornography, etc. But addiction reaches far beyond that. Let’s dig into a little psychology to understand why.

(The following are excerpts from Addiction and Grace by Gerald May.)

Humans frequently repress our desire for love because love makes us vulnerable to being hurt.  We also do the same thing with our deepest longings for God. God does not always come to us in the pleasant ways we might expect, and so we repress our desire for God. 

Why Am I So…Anxious?

Why Am I So…Anxious?

Green grass, roaming sheep, and misty mountains. I had dreamed of visiting Ireland for many years. As I arrived in May of 2018, the beauty and the feeling of a new adventure coupled with anxiety and unfamiliarity. After many years of wanting to visit, here I was: struggling to shake the nerves away.

What you may not know about me is that I have been dealing with anxiety my whole life. I never knew what it was…I just assumed this is how everyone felt. When I realized it wasn’t, I knew I couldn’t stay locked up and fearful. I started counseling early in 2018 to find healthy ways to cope so I could live my healthiest life. Of course, I had already booked our trip to Ireland before counseling sessions were on the calendar. I knew that traveling was going to fill me with anxiety and all I could do was pray I could enjoy it and hope that it would be an opportunity to practice what I was learning.

My Favorite Day of the Year

My Favorite Day of the Year

When I was in college, I had a lot of friends that were international students. I loved spending time with them, learning about their culture, and introducing them to mine.

That was, in a large part, due to the influence of College Heights Christian Church, the church that I called home while I was in college. This church loved people from around the world and tried as hard as they could to welcome them and make them feel loved.

That was important. Statistics during that time showed that over seventy percent of international students never entered an American home and even less ever checked out a church service.

College Heights connected international students with American families, taught English to refugees, and took international students on camping trips, but the Goat Roast was always my favorite day of the year.

A Lasting Impact

A Lasting Impact

 For most of my life, church was simply a place. More specifically, a building that I went to. 

When I was in my early 20’s, I can remember working through the first big steps of adulthood. You know the drill. Finish school. Get a job. Get married. Buy a house. Today, I think they call this “adulting.” Back then, I called it a whirlwind because it all happened at once and it was a lot to navigate. 

Rachelle and I settled into a community on the west side of Indianapolis, ready and eager to develop a rhythm as a new married couple. One of those rhythms was to find a church home. It took us a few years, but eventually we landed at Plainfield Christian Church and began attending services and serving.