Now that we have looked at the “why” of child training, and are working towards a loving, healthy relationship with our children, we need to dive into ingredient three: clear expectations and consistent consequences.
First, have I clearly communicated to my child that I expect them to obey right away and with a good attitude? We might need to ask ourselves these questions: Am I a threatening parent? (Johnny, if you don’t…then I am going to…) Am I a parent that tells them to do something and then starts counting? (Jenny, I told you to…1 - 2 - 3 …) Am I a parent who laughs when they disobey sometimes, and then flies off the handle when they disobey other times? All of these things are confusing and disheartening to a child. Confusing expectations and inconsistent consequences are exasperating to children. We need to clearly communicate to our children both verbally and with consistent consequences that we expect them to obey right away and with a good attitude both us, as parents, and other adults who are in authority over them— grandparents, teachers, etc.